1 week ago
It was a agelong nighttime for Tom Brady astatine his unrecorded Netflix drama roast, arsenic it was for nan remainder of america watching from home.
Starting pinch a bloody OJ Simpson jersey and ending pinch Tom Brady smashing an iPhone connected stage, nan Netflix unrecorded event, “The Greatest Roast of All-Time: Tom Brady,” honored nan seven-time Super Bowl champion and modern-day fable arsenic he faced his biggest situation yet: being roasted by comedians and his erstwhile NFL teammates.
At times hilarious and astatine others a spot cringeworthy, nan unedited unrecorded arena was a lengthy matter that made 1 genuinely admit nan editors of nan Comedy Central Roasts. Their task was to condense nan contented into a concise, entertaining 60-minute presentation. Nonetheless, nan “joke of nan night” came from nan GOAT himself erstwhile addressing Kim Kardashian and referencing her ex-husband Kanye West: “I cognize Kim was terrified to beryllium present tonight. Not because of this, but because her kids are astatine location pinch their dad.”
Part of Netflix Is a Joke Fest, “Greatest Roasts of All Time: Tom Brady” featured nan erstwhile quarterback, known for his 20 seasons pinch nan New England Patriots and 3 pinch nan Tampa Bay Buccaneers, taking humorous jabs from immoderate of nan biggest names successful comedy. Hosted by Kevin Hart and Roastmaster Jeff Ross, nan arena included erstwhile teammates Julian Edelman, Rob Gronkowski, and Drew Bledsoe, arsenic good arsenic stand-up comics Tom Segura, Nikki Glaser, Andrew Schulz, Bert Kreischer, Tony Hinchcliffe, Sam Jay, and more.
“We’re present to roast nan top backmost of each time,” Hart quipped. “Oh, wait, Joe Montana’s here?”
A montage of Brady’s achievements, starting from his days astatine nan University of Michigan and highlighting his travel to becoming a three-time NFL MVP, group nan shape for nan evening.
Brady made a expansive entranceway onto a shape surrounded by his erstwhile teammates, exclaiming to nan crowd, “Are you guys ready? It’s crippled time. Let’s go!”
VIP tables, occupied by Chelsea Handler, Jim Gaffigan, Shane Gillis, and Netflix executives Ted Sarandos and Bela Bajaria, encircled nan stage, adding to nan star-studded ambiance of nan event.
Former teammate “Gronk” took nan spotlight pinch nan astir peculiar moments of nan night, delivering a sometimes incoherent barrage of jokes that culminated successful smashing a solid connected nan stage, causing it to shatter and nonstop shards flying onto adjacent tables.
Here are immoderate of nan champion jokes and craziest moments from nan special:
More to come…
- “This is wherever Jerry Bus laid his dick out. This was called nan Fucking Forum.” – Kevin Hart
- “Tom brought Boston pinch him tonight. I’ve ne'er seen Inglewood truthful white. It looks for illustration a Bruce Springsteen performance conscionable fto out. This utilized to beryllium nan location of nan Lakers; now it’s nan location of nan Quakers.” – Kevin Hart
- “I’m not present for your support. I’m present for nan money. They paid maine very well.” — Kevin Hart
- “It’s been 2 years since Tom has gotten divorced. And since then, Tom’s been fucking. Tom has been putting that two-inch instrumentality to work. Tom has been fucking truthful much; his dick has gotten CTE.” — Kevin Hart
- “Gisele is present arsenic Antonio Brown’s positive one.” — Kevin Hart
- “You cognize who other fucked that coach. Gisele. She fucked that karate man…. 8 karate classes a day, and she’s still a achromatic belt?” — Kevin Hart
- “Chelsea Handler is here…. Speaking of achromatic dick, Kim is present tonight.”
- “I’ve conscionable travel from hell. Aaron Hernandez says hello.” — Jeff Ross
- “I had to dress for illustration OJ because I’m astir to termination this achromatic bitch correct here.” — Jeff Ross
- “You really put nan Jizz successful Gisele.” — Jeff Ross
- “You look for illustration a vampire that only drinks almond blood.” — Jeff Ross
- “I really wanted Kevin [Hart] to big because he already looks for illustration a deflated football.” — Jeff Ross
- “Surely, if Mark Twain were astir today, he would telephone you a N…. a nationalist treasure.” — Jeff Ross
- “I emotion you, Dana; you’re for illustration Michael Vick but pinch quality beings.” — Jeff Ross
- “We’re doing it Boston style tonight. You cognize it’s going to marathon, and somebody’s gonna bomb.” — Jeff Ross
- “We wanted to roast you successful Florida, but because of your governor, we wouldn’t person been capable to telephone you gay.” — Jeff Ross
- “Don’t opportunity that crap again.”
- “I’m nan champion determination your statement has ever made. Would you for illustration a massage?”– Jeff Ross
- Segura:
- “I emotion your movies, aliases arsenic I for illustration to telephone them, short films.” — Nikki Glaser towards Kevin Hart
- “This shape has seen much trauma than a Kennedy connected nan run trail.” — Andrew Schulz
- “ACL is nan only wounded Gronk tin spell.” — Andrew Schulz
- Kreischer:
- Hinchcliffe:
- Jay:
- Edelman:
- Gronkowski:
- Bledsoe:
- Affleck:
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